So i know it doesn’t seem like much, but i think I am getting better. Instead of being on the verge of tears all of the time, i am just unhappy and lonely. In another 4 days, I will have been back in the US for a month. I have had moments of having fun, but altogether the best time I’ve had was that hour and a half in French club. Hearing everyone speak French and the 3 French girls having the accents of the people around Saint-Etienne felt SOOO GOOOD! I will definitely be there every meeting and will see if i can hang out with more people from there more often.
Other good times I have had have been at the gay clubs. IDK if it is that i feel better around them because of my sexuality, if they are just more fun, or what it is exactly but it is more fun to me than a straight club. They are more free and wild and crazy and actually dance, i feel like i can dance with a guy
if i want to or dance with a girl if i want to. I guess it is just that i have more of the chance to be me.
I’d like to join more clubs to find more people to talk to. The Japanese club on Thursdays right before the French club meetings might be a possibility, the African club seems interesting too, but i work right after the French club meetings. The Gay Straight Alliance meetings is the other club I would like to attend. I’d like to be around more gays and find other bi’s to hang out with. At the very least, now I have a club to go to on Saturdays that I know I can have fun at, I just need friends that will actually want to go there with me.