Je suis pas comme les autres

I thought I had a really good day today; my lab went good, class was alright, French class was great, working the desk was good because I got to talk to a great resident for most of it, and I had a good workout and had a good inner monologue in my head telling me to keep pushing. However, during the same workout that same phrase kept going through my head every 5 seconds.
Ever since I became proficient at French I’ve had moments in my head where if I’m not thinking in one particular language things are repeated once in one language then in the other (i.e. “he had said that” then “il a dit ca”). But this is me having positive self-talk, which hadn’t been happening recently, to negative self-talk in French.
I don’t know how to approach this. I’m just glad that it is “je” and not “il”. If it was then it wouldn’t be my voice in my head, it be another voice.
Is my conscious brain trying to be happy and my unconscious trying to pull me back down to Earth? Is this how I truly feel and I was just trying to mask it. Is this how life will always be with another language in my head? Am I just slipping into madness?





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